Book Review: Untangling Emotions
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Untangling Emotions
Book Author: J. Alasdair Groves and Winston T. Smith
Review Author: Camille
Darling Downs Free Reformed Church
Pro Ecclesia Bookshop
2019/240 pages
Emotions are hard. Or at least I think they are hard. They can be confusing, disorienting and at times our emotional experience is so intense that we are completely overwhelmed. They are difficult to define and very hard to understand in ourselves and in those around us.
In today’s culture and within the church, there are two very common ways that people will respond to emotion. The first response, which seems to be so dominant in our culture today, is to lean in and embrace emotion completely. To lead with heart. In contrast, the second response offers the attitude that we should avoid emotions altogether. We must squash them away. Be strong, silent and completely unshaken by what life throws at you. Both responses are two ends of a spectrum and most people will naturally gravitate one way or another depending on personality, culture and experience. Is one way right and the other wrong? Is something else the right way?
What does scripture teach us about our emotions?
All these questions and more have been tumbling around in my head for some time. That is why I was so excited to sink my teeth into the book Untangling Emotions by Alasdair Groves and Winston Smith. It is a fantastic read which gently challenged my own understandings of emotions and helped answer so many of the misunderstandings and questions I had.
Throughout the book, the authors carefully examine what the bible tells us of our emotions. As they dig into the theology around this topic, they open the door to understanding that emotions are an incredible gift and an integral part to what makes us human. We serve an emotional God, and our own emotions are a part of how we carry the image of God.
Across the pages, the authors examine the many different factors in our lives that have influence over us and our emotions. They have a strong understanding of the mind-body connection of our emotions – how our bodies often amplify our emotions, how we feel things physically and how things that are happening physically have an impact on our emotions. They also provide solid insight into how our emotions never stop coming at us, instead they tumble, push and shove as we continue to interact with the world we live in.
As they share wisdom, encouragement and insight into such a confusing and hard topic, Groves and Smith do not pass judgment over our emotional experiences. They do not call some emotions bad and others good. Instead, they carefully show how all emotions are a reflection of our values and beliefs and shine a light on what is really going on in our hearts. With a knowledge and understanding that finds itself solidly based in scripture, they outline how sin twists many of the things that we love so that the positive or negative emotions we experience may not line up with what is commanded of us in scripture.
Across the book, it is demonstrated that our emotions communicate the value we place on the things that we love. When understood and engaged within the way that God has intended for us to use them, our emotions help us to connect with one another, they move and motivate us toward doing what is right and above all they turn us to God.
The book is well written and thoughtful. It gently encourages the reader to reflect and grow in an understanding of their own emotions and the emotions of the people they love and care for. Each chapter is informative and thought-provoking, with questions at the end to help the reader reflect on what they do with their own emotions and how they talk about emotions with others.
Untangling Emotions offers a very biblical approach to engaging with our emotions. It is an approach and understanding that is helpful and edifying for those who have fairly stable emotional experience or seem to be able to ignore their feelings, empowering them to really take note and engage more with what is going on inside and bring that before God. At the same time it is a wonderful tool for those who find emotions scary, overwhelming or that they are controlled by their emotions, providing a structure to step back and observe what is happening before examining and evaluating it in more detail so that they can take the right actions as opposed to ones that do not serve or glorify God.
As we learn more about our emotions, we learn to see more of the things that we love. We can use them to identify different idols in our lives, we can continue to engage with our emotions learning more and more to engage with God at the same time.
The book is available from Pro Ecclesia Bookshop and from Providence Bookshop Albany, and may also be loaned from Trellis Counselling Library.